theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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