he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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