He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You were trust falling into bushes
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize