OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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