weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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