You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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