so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
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