Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
