Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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