I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.