DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize