If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
