capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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