So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
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