you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
