ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.