Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
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don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
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i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.