I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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