So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
