I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I fill condoms, not promises.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
