it wasn't lemon gatorade
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize