thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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