This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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