their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
