told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
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Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
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It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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