like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
