Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Randomize
