you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Sober January is a disaster.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
