Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
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