i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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