Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
