last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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