so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
