apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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