I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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