She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize