My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children