wanna go halves on a baby?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize