I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
