Farmville is her only friend.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
