Where did you get a picture of my penis
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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