At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
