He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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