she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize