i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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