She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize