The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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