I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
