So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
