I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize