Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
