I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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