You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
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